First Steps

Gotcha day is one of the most exciting days. It's emotional and overwhelming and glorious. Gotcha day was so exciting in fact that once we all laid down to go to sleep my eyes were wide open! I think I slept all of an hour Monday night. I was so wound up, my bedmates were snoring (both of them) and the jet lag set in. So Todd woke up at 2am (like most mornings) and we hung out, had our coffee, attempted to go back to sleep and gave up:)

Tuesday we headed out for our Visa appt. In India it's generally cheaper to book a car for a few hours rather than pay for the here and there. The driver arrived on time and before we knew it we were pulling up to the Embassy (with an empty barf bag I might add, yay). The driver pulled over (aka as stopped in the middle of a lane-in a traffic circle-in New Delhi, in his defense there was no where else to do so). We were trying to make arrangements for pick up with our driver. We hurriedly did so and paid for this later. The policeman/guard quickly came over and was letting the driver have it, so we leapt out of the car and didn't look back. 

Walking up to the Embassy we immediately saw a long line of Indian people waiting to get through the security check. We knew as U.S. citizens we didn't have to wait in the lines. We walked right up to the guard and said "American Citizen" this flows freely from your mouth at every check point when you are at an Embassy (it's a Lee Greenwood- Proud to be an American-moment no doubt). The guard checked our passports and wasn't happy to see that Shanti brought along her Dora backpack. The Embassy doesn't allow phones, bags etc to be brought inside. We went back and forth until he compromised and agreed to hold it for her, ha. I was honestly glad to see his diligence on security. Shanti fished out the little toy ponies her sister gave her and the toy duck from Tarana. We made our way through security and past TONS of waiting people until we found ourself at the point where you do the paperwork. We were told to be seated and wait but again knew as citizens we had priority as would an Indian national at their consulate in the U.S. Daddy took charge and fairly quickly we were standing at a window sliding all the paperwork under the glass separating us from the kind worker. The whole thing took about 15 minutes or less. Shanti was SO patient just fiddling with her toys or wanting me to hold her. We were directed to the cashier. It appears that despite a sign hanging above our heads saying they accept dollars, Rupee, Visa or Mastercard (also on the website) they said cash only. We had plenty of Rupee or so we thought. We also had a combo of dollars and rupee. The guy told us what we needed to pay: 44,000 Rupee (or so we heard). We still haven't got the conversion down and were anxious to get it done (normally we would plug it into our conversion app for iphone but no phone in the embassy). We had over 20K rupee but wasn't enough. Todd right away said we need to speak to someone above you as it clearly states here you take cards and yet he was refusing to do so. A respectable looking guy showed up within a few minutes. At first he was going to make us come back but then changed his mind and said he would do the Visa interview and then come back and pay. We went back to the other window where we clarified the amount needed so we could collect that after the interview. The clerk said yes it's 14,000 something Rupee. Huh?!  "I write it down for you" remember there's a sheet of glass and he has a hefty accent. It was not Rp 44,000 it was Rp 14! GOT IT! We all realized the mistake and despite our spiritied exchanges only moments before all was well. We paid the Rupee, did the interview which lasted about 5 minutes (again looking through the glass) and he said we will call your hotel if it's ready today or you can pick up tomorrow. Minus the Rupee/Payment misunderstanding it was an easy process just as we had been told by the families who went before us. Make a note: just because paperwork and a sign say they take Mastercard or Visa, bring cash only and save yourself the hassle, just saying:)

When our driver dumped us out we were fairly sure we told him to come back in about 30 min and he described that he would be driving past to keep an eye out for us. Again no iphone. We waited over 30 minutes then decided forget it...we are hailing a rickshaw! Now for some of you this sounds like no big deal but I will ask: 1. Do you know the make-up of a rickshaw 2. Have you ridden a rickshaw with your child in Delhi at peak traffic times? ha! We hopped in the rickshaw and for the next 10 minutes we wheeled in and out of traffic circles, wind in our faces, horns blowing and Shanti grinning and soaking it in. She loved the rickshaw and so did I. We may catch another cruise this morning before the traffic picks up. I didn't have my camera and think she needs her picture in one for sure.

We came back to our hotel, Todd called the driver and went back out for a few things from the pharmacy and before we new it the front desk was calling saying the Embassy called and the Visa was ready! Todd went and got it and was back in no time! DONE! DONE! DONE! YAY. We were so thankful. Our official girl was napping beside me. Sweet. 

When Shanti woke up she was quiet but not in a way we had witnessed so far (this wasn't a shyness). She had a look of concern and fear. I put her in my lap and held her while Todd laid beside us. We realized she was holding back tears. We said Thika cry Shanti (OK to cry Shanti). We pointed in her little picture dictionary and asked if she was sad or scared and I was proud to see her gently and honestly nod yes. Her eyes spilled over with tears and at this point we were crying quietly with her. I held her and she leaned into me while Todd laid near. He translated some things to her. We reminded her we will never leave her and that she is safe. She looked in our eyes filled with tears and we repeated, "thika to cry Shanti". All the grief and loss she must be experiencing. All the grief and loss she has already experienced. The more unanswered questions. It was so painful to see her wounds and see her hurting. Our hearts hurt so deeply for her. Instead of trying to make her laugh or move past it we have been taught that allowing an adopted child to experience all stages of grief and loss is critical for healing. We've also been taught to grieve with them. I probably would have failed to do this instinctively and I'm so thankful for the other adoptive parents, social workers and scholars who talk about the real stuff concerning adoption. We expect this will be the first of many of those moments. We stayed like that for a while. Todd stepped out and I continued to hold her. She had her arms wrapped around my neck and I could feel her sweet fingers moving across my back. She would occasionally wipe a tear but willing rested in my arms. I asked her if she wanted to go eat with Mama and in a few minutes she was bustling around getting ready. Just like that the moment was gone but it will forever be in our hearts. All the stages won't be this tender or restful. Pray for her and us as we journey this with her. 

We made our way downstairs. Remember I haven't slept in 24 hours. Upon entering the restaurants all Shanti's peeps greeted her with high fives and sweet smiles. Our favorite manager and waiter immediately started talking to her in Hindi. They speak English well and willingly translate for us. He asked me were we there for lunch or dinner. I said, "What time is it?" ha! It was 2:30pm. We decided on a snack and the manager rattled off options. She said, "Cake!" So you better believe she got cake. Of course they brought her two and she gobbled down the strawberry. We still haven't figured out her drink preference. She likes water but requests milk then doesn't drink it. They say she's asking for cold milk with a little sugar. Something about it doesn't suit her though. We did crafts in the hotel lobby and talked to one of the hotel employees who was intrigued by it all. Later in the day I have to say she was much more talkative and interactive. I think it helped to let go of some of those emotions. I'm trying to convince her to let me record her reciting, "One Little Apple Hanging in a Tree" ADORABLE with her accent! She apparently knows a lot of poems. It was good to see her being playful and comfortable. She told me about her friends at WHC and who had been adopted. We looked back through her pictures and videos from our tour of the orphanage and watched Pryce and Knox's video where they toured our house and showed her all around. She loved it.

Before dinner, she and Todd did some crafts together. She will let Todd hold her etc but still is a bit unsure (although she flashed a genuine toothy grin when Todd kissed her on the forehead earlier:)The hesitance with a new daddy is apparently not uncommon as most children from orphanages rarely interact with men so we expected it. We ordered room service for dinner. We got her Dal makhni which is black lentils with tomato and cream, basmati rice and Indian potato bread called Bharwan Kulcha. She loved it! It's the best we've seen her eat so far and we loved it too. This I think I can make in Amedrika:)

We were in bed by 6:30pm and I slept until almost midnight. Todd woke up about 1am and here we are, as usual, wide awake:) 

Pryce and Knox are having a blast with the cousins in Tenn. Jill said they lit up when they saw the pics and video of Shanti and they are very excited!

A few things about Shanti:

-She smiles A LOT! 

-She's a little shy.

-She's very friendly.

-She's meticulous. I've seen her dump out a package of markers so she could organize them appropriately. Todd has picked up on this too and you can imagine he loves it, ha.

-She loves chocolate

-She loves crafts and can draw really well.

-She can say her ABC's and many English words but we are still trying to figure out how much she understands.

-She writes her S backwards:)

-She can sleep through anything (orphanage life). We have the light on, we are talking, whatever. She falls asleep quickly and sleeps well.

-She likes to dress up and put bows, clips or barrettes in her hair.

-Shes' teeny! She has wiggle room in 3T dresses!

We roll out of here Thursday night! We can't wait to get home to Pryce and Knox and get the show on the road. Pray for continued health here as we are all recovering from colds (we are suspecting Shanti's sickness had something to do with upper respiratory). Pray for the flights home and that all is on time and goes well. 

Much Love.

G and T